Time to Heal Part 3

So, I wish I could say that I declared war on RLS and that was the end of it. I magically got better and all was perfect. Unfortunately, deciding to do something and doing it are two different things. I definitely got worse before I got better.

Here is what I most remember. I decided to see an RLS specialist but there was over a month until I could get in so my general practitioner put me on Lyrica to see if it would help. I had good luck with gabapentin until it stopped working and Lyrica is similar but stronger. Hands down that was the most painful experience of my life. I should have never put those pills in my mouth. I had side effects from the first day on Lyrica. But that was nothing compared to what I went through when I stopped it.

I've never done drugs, I've never smoked a cigarette, and now I avoid prescription medications unless I absolutely have to take them - like antibiotics. I have a new found respect for people going through drug/alcohol detox - I have never been through pain like that before and I never want to again.  We weren't expecting it but for several weeks I couldn't sleep, I could barely eat. And every single part of my body hurt. I hardly got out of bed. I watched tv and I did cross stitches because that helped to take my mind of the pain. And of course, I was also having RLS every night at this time.

The trip to the so called specialist didn't help either. I tried two medications from him and they made me so sick I couldn't eat. And he basically told me I was screwed, RLS patients get worse not better. When he gave me a methadone script though I drew I line in the sand. I kept the script for a long time - I would never use it. It was everything I didn't want. The rest of my life on meds that make me sick, no career, no kids (we were exploring surrogacy because I couldn't be pregnant on those medications), I life of pain and misery.

You gotta love vet school!!

 Medication wasn't healing me, it wasn't going to make me better. Apparently I'm really sensitive to side affects and I refused to live my life this way. I took tramadol through most of the summer - which gives me the worst headache and turns me into a zombie by the way. But I took it while John and I researched every possible cure for RLS. I have a great respect for western medicine, but in this case it failed me. There is was not a magic pill to make me better. At this point I tried everything, scientific or not to get me better so I could start school. Frankly, I would have danced naked under the full moon swinging a rubber chicken around my head if someone had told me it would cure me of RLS.

I started losing weight because John and I found a study linking being overweight with RLS and I was about 20lbs overweight at the time. I took every supplement I could find that anyone said helped there RLS. I started eating better. I meditated, took hot epsom salt baths, and started doing yoga, and I wrote in my journal. I also found that when I had moderate symptoms I could sleep with a TENS machine attached to my legs and it would help with the pain so that I could sleep better. I got off all medications. I would take ambien 1-2 times a week if I had a rough night. And, the weekend before I started classes. I had my first RLS free night of sleep.

It didn't stay gone, but I did get through the year. I made it through the first half of the first semester and then I started gabapentin so that I could finish. I spent Christmas break stopping gabapentin. Everytime I stop a medication the RLS gets worse before it goes back to baseline, so stopping a med is an ordeal in and of itself. Second semester I made it through the entire semester without meds, until finals week.

Each time the RLS has come back we've learned more about getting it gone once and for all. Tomorrow, I'll tell you about where I am at now and how I've finally gotten to a place of healing.

First day of veterinary school - Yes, it's cheesy to take a picture, but it was for my parents :)